It's funny (but not really)

note: My first couple of posts are going to be kind of related and I wasn't really sure which one to write about first, so sorry if there is any confusion.

wassup?

So it has been a little over one week since we got back from new mexico. good times. But ever since I have been home, I have been feeling really stressed out. In New Mexico, I never really felt any of the pressure that I normally feel when I am at home. School, work, money, family, busy, busy, rides here, rides there. I came home from New Mexico and ran into a brick wall of stress and it really bummed me out. I was especially frustrated on the first day back because it seemed like all my family wanted to talk about was making me more stressed. Man (or woman, I don't mean to be discriminatory), talk about frustrating. You did not want to talk to me that day. It's funny because I go to New Mexico and share with these kids about God and how they can put all of their trust in him and then I go back home and try to carry everything on my own shoulders. It took me a couple of hours at home, stressing out, and taking my frustrations out on others to finally get them all out and realize what was going on. I have a control problem. I need to feel like I am in control. I wish I could be in control and handle it but I can't, not by myself at least. I need God's help and I know that I can put all of my trust in Him, yet I don't. It's kind of funny, but not really if I really think about it. Let me tell you a cheesy story: There was a boy named Frank (or girl named Lisa, again not discriminatory) and he(she) was failing pre calc. Oh boy(girl), it was ugly. I'm talking 30%. However, everyday after class the teacher would talk to Frank (Lisa) and offer him a little help. Okay, a lot of help, he was offering Frank (Lisa) a free A+. WOOHOO PARTY! Except Frank (Lisa) would never excpet it. He(she) always chose to try it on his own and still he couldn't get it right. This is how I feel sometimes with my relationship with God. (See how cheesy that was, I loved it). Little by little I am giving in, whether it is praying about guidance in my still undecided future in college or journaling about what I am feeling here and now, and little by little I am beginning to feel the burden being lifted off my shoulders. The power of God's grace and love for us will shine through in His plans for us, we need to just let Jesus take the wheel (Thanks Carrie Underwood).

good night